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Some Thoughts About Secrets of the Sex Masters

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What would it be like to collect the wisdom of some of the best-known sex and relationship educators in one volume? That’s what Carl Frankel set out to do with Secrets of the Sex Masters. The book takes a different approach than many other guides. Each chapter was either written by someone known for their […]

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Book Review: Sweet and Rough by Sinclair Sexsmith

Talking about sex all day sometimes makes it difficult for me to read erotica. I know plenty of sexuality professionals who love reading steamy stories for fun, but I find that it takes something special to grab my attention. Sweet and Rough by Sinclair Sexsmith is exactly that. First off, can I just say how […]

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A Sex-Positive Approach For Academia

Earlier this week, I was a guest speaker for a class at Stanford University. My talk on sex-positivity was a lot of fun and the students were awesome. And at the end of it, I was asked what students can do to bring a sex-positive lens to their academic studies. It’s been a long time […]

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What Affirmative Consent Looks Like

It’s been really excited to see the progress of California Senate Bill 967. If it gets signed, it will require all universities that receive financial aid to use a standard of “affirmative consent” in disciplinary hearings about sexual assault. In a nutshell, it shifts things from “did anyone say no?” to “did everyone say yes?” […]

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End Demand Is Bad For Sex Workers

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One of the most disheartening shifts I’ve seen in the political battles around sex work is the growing trend for various jurisdictions to shift towards a version of the Nordic Model, in which buying sexual services is illegal. While it’s a minor improvement over arresting sex workers, it’s an incredibly flawed and overly simplistic approach. […]

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I Refuse To Be One Of “The Good Men”

In all of the recent conversations about male privilege, violence against women, and misogyny, there’s been a lot of debate about “not all men.” When guys are confronted with the many ways in which men hurt, harass, and abuse women, it’s a pretty common response for us to say, “I’m not like that.” Many of […]

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Cisgenderfluid

“How do you identify?” That’s often a tough question for me to answer. As a general rule, I’ve shifted away from identifying as anything because I’ve found that when I do, it can be hard to let go of that self-identity when things change. In my experience, life brings lots of surprises that are difficult […]

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