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Clipped from: cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com (share this clip)
It won’t be any news to you that things aren’t equal between men and women. The toll of sexism on everyone, regardless of gender, is huge, although it lands differently on different people. But this guy is trying to deal with it in exactly the wrong way.
Roy Den Hollander is a lawyer who’s all worked up about gender-based discrimination. His problem though, isn’t that women make less money than men, that they’re judged for their looks more than men, or that women are much more likely to be sexually harassed and assaulted than men. No, his beef is that bars and clubs often offer women free or discounted admission and gosh darn it, it’s not fair. So
Continue reading The Wrong Way to End Sexism
Two articles came through my in-box the other day. I found one of them rather thought-provoking and the other quite irritating. But they both had one thing in common. Well, actually, more than one thing, but they had one thing in common that I found especially difficult.
They were both using gender-essentialist language to talk about men and sexism.
In Fight the Sexualization of Young Girls the Right Way, Sarah Seltzer discusses why we need to shine a light on the sexualization of girls and young women without ending up being anti-sex. It’s a good look at the challenges in navigating that. She argues very convincingly that what we need to do is make room for young people to explore and discover their authentic
Continue reading Gender Essentialism, Masculinity, and Sex-Negativity
Clipped from: www.afreesociety.org (share this clip)
One of the difficulties I’ve seen when it comes to discussions and debates around sexual practices and communities of erotic affiliation centers on the notion of consent.
On one side, there are the folks who bring everything back to the question of the individual. The general argument is that if a person consents to a particular act, then there isn’t any reason that they shouldn’t be allowed to do it. Yes, this is a vast oversimplification of a much more complex statement, but it often boils down to the notion that people should be able to anything they want, as long as they and their partner(s) consent to it.
On the other hand, there are people
Continue reading Consent, Open Relationships, and Sex-Positivity
This post also appeared on the Good Vibrations Magazine.
Clipped from: feministing.com (share this clip)
What is it with schools not letting teens bring dates to the prom?
According to the Sydney Morning Herald, Hannah Williams wanted to bring her girlfriend to the prom and the folks in charge at Ivanhoe Girls’ Grammar School in Melbourne (an all-girls school) wouldn’t let her.
Their justifications are really interesting. Hannah’s father says that ”[t]he school kept saying because it is an all-girls school we want to make an event where they can meet boys in a social scenario.” Of course, not all girls want to meet boys in a social scenario, for any of a number of reasons. So then the principal took another tack:
Continue reading Australian Teen Can’t Take Her Girlfriend to the Prom
Clipped from: www.ottawacitizen.com (share this clip)
Via Salon.com
There’s an interesting court case going on in Ottawa. The case revolves around the question of consent when someone is passed out.
According to the Ottawa Citizen (article taken down as of 3/9/11), a male-female couple negotiated an erotic asphyxiation scene in which he would choke her to the point of unconsciousness. When she awoke, it was to discover that he had inserted a dildo into her anus. And two of the core issues here are whether she consented in advance to whatever he decided to do while she was unconscious, and whether it’s possible to consent in advance.
Without knowing more details, I’m not willing to come down on whether I think that this particular
Continue reading Can You Consent to Sex in Advance?
This post also appeared on the Good Vibrations Magazine.
Clipped from: www.helsinkitimes.fi (share this clip)
According to the Helsinki Times and Huffington Post, over 30,000 people have left the Finnish Evangelical-Lutheran Church, the national church of Finland. The reason? They held a debate on LBGT rights and comments made by various folks on the anti side were deemed too homophobic to tolerate.
In general, about 800 people leave the church each week, so this is a major spike. And with 4.3 million members, that’s one out of every 14 members leaving. If one out of every 14 people in the US stood up to homophobia, we might not need the It Gets Better Project.
Just saying.
Continue reading Homophobia in Church? Finns Say “No Way!”
This post also appeared on the Good Vibrations Magazine.
An article on the Stranger.com asks the question “why are so many gay kids killing themselves?” And the answer is that queer kids have always been at higher risk for suicide, drug abuse, depression, and sexual assault. For example, queer kids comprise up to 30% of teen suicides. And although we don’t know how many people are queer, it’s safe to say that it’s less than 30%, so there’s clearly a disproportionate impact.
Queer youth are also more likely to be homeless, mostly because their parents kick them out of the house when they come out (the awful term for it is “throwaway kids”). Imagine having to choose between being true to yourself or having a
Continue reading Homophobia, Bullying, and Queer Youth Suicides
When the topic of slut-shaming comes up, it’s often said that there is no equivalent for men. After all, the terms used for men who have a lot of sex or a lot of sex partners are things like ladies-man, stud, or Don Juan. They lack the negativity of slut and I’m certainly not going to claim that there aren’t different rules for men and women when it comes to sex. After all, I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone called a stud to try to shame him into complying with gender roles or to punish him.
At the same time, it’s often overlooked that there is a comparable dynamic that affects men. Boys and men who act in ways that don’t fit within
Continue reading Fag Bashing & Slut Shaming: It’s About Policing Gender Roles
This post also appeared on the Good Vibrations Magazine.
Clipped from: au.news.yahoo.com (share this clip)
According to an article from the West.com.au, an Australian Court of Appeal has handed down a decision that transgender men are not legally men:
In a summary of the 63-page judgment, the court said Chief Justice Martin and Justice Pullin took the view that the essential question was whether the physical characteristics of the two transsexuals, including their internal and external genitalia, would identify them as a member of the male gender.
“In their (the majority) view, because each individual possessed none of the genital and reproductive physical characteristics of a male, and retained nearly all of the normal external genital characteristics and the internal reproductive organs of
Continue reading The Technology of Gender
This post first appeared on the Good Vibrations Magazine.
Clipped from: www.time.com (share this clip)
It’s been known for a while that men tend to have a shorter life expectancy than women. While there are a few guesses as to why that is, one factor is having a macho attitude.
Time Magazine reports that some new research shows that emotional openness increased boys’ mental health through middle school. Further, it’s known that men who try to tough it out when they need medical attention don’t get the care they need. Being able to ask for help is a much more effective way to deal with life’s challenges than trying to go it alone. As the saying goes, many hands make light work.
And yet,
Continue reading Emotional Skills Help Men Live Longer
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